We Watch Bad Internet Gardening Videos So You Don’t Have To

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We’d love to feature your video, but please read these simple guidelines before submitting:

  • We hate to be the one to tell you this, but your videos of Handy Weekly Garden Tips are insanely boring.  Please don’t send them.  A single Handy Garden Tip can ruin our entire day.
  • Videos depicting the abuse or subjugation of garden gnomes will receive special consideration.
  • All videos that begin, “Hi, I’m Bob, and I’m here this week with Jane to talk about…” are summarily rejected.
  • Soundtracks that include wind chimes or pan flutes give us the creeps.
  • Footage of your children and/or pets frolicking in the garden are adorable only to you. 
  • Slow pans of gardens (either yours or someone else’s), with no narration other than the sound of wind on the microphone, will fail to capture our attention.
  • We’re a sucker for:  farm animals, bugs, any kind of special effects, and anything with a plot.  (by that we mean "story," not "a small piece of ground, generally used for a specific purpose.")
  • A madcap sense of humor, camp, high drama, live action, etc. will win you bonus points and a special place in our hearts.

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