Why Don’t You People CALL ME Before You Do Something Stupid?


So I was going to pull out all the relevant little excerpts from this episode of "Better Off Ted" to make it easy on you.   But Hulu makes me watch a commercial before every attempt to extract the clip I want, so I finally had to stop and just put up the full episode. What do you care–it's almost Christmas, and you're not working anyway, are you?  So settle in and make your list.  How many garden mistakes can you spot in this episode?

Okay, here we go!

First, that "Greening Our World" commercial is hilarious. Brilliant.

Second, it's not a roof garden you want to green your building, it's a green roof!  Dang.

Third, is that a bucket of nightcrawlers you've got there?  What are you, going fishing?  Where exactly do you expect them to live?  If you needed some Eisenia fetida, I could have rented them to you!  They're non-union, so they work cheap.

Fourth, why is everything freakishly all in bloom at once? The summer bloomers, the spring bloomers, it's all happening on the same day in Better Off Ted-Land.

Fifth–well.  I don't even know what to say about that weird-ass garden.  Is that fake grass or are we to believe they've planted a lawn on the roof?

Sixth–one week later and you're eating perfectly red, round, store-bought tomatoes that somehow came from your rooftop garden?

Really, Hollywood.  I'm right here all day long, sitting around in my pajamas, just waiting for somebody to call so I can tell them what to do.  Please call me before you put another crappy garden in your sitcom.  I'm standing by. 


  1. I had the same problems way back in my youth when I worked as a zookeeper. I cringe when I see tigers in a Tarzan movie, penguins at the north pole and a cheetah when the role calls for a leopard. Doesn’t hollywood know there are people out there that will notice these flubs?

  2. John, are you sure there were tigers in the Tarzan movies? Indian elephants with fake big ears to look like African elephants, yes. Tigers, no. In his first Tarzan book, Edgar Rice Burroughs had Simba the tiger which the editors changed to Simba the lioness.

  3. I said movie when I really meant TV show – oops. I forgot to add Penguin Ice Co. that uses a puffin as its mascot. Drives me crazy.

  4. If you’re an expert in an area, then you can’t watch TV about your expertise. Doctors can’t watch hospital shows, and cops can’t watch police dramas.

    Don’t even get me started on the fantasy of computer programming that’s portrayed by Hollywood.

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