Earth to Brya

I got the most intriguing comment over on my blog - from a "Brya" somewhere Down Under.  He/she had lots of interesting things to say about the growing of various vegetables but closed by promoting two products that he/she sells - Iguana Juice, pictured here, and Scorpion Juice. Naturally my guard was up coz I'm ready to hit the delete-as-spam button at the slightest provocation.

But just look at the artwork, not to mention the product names.  Click this baby for a close-up.  Apparently Iguana Juice is an organic fertilizer made of fish, krill (say what?), kelp meal and earthworm castings.  Okay, I know most of those ingredients and they're cool with me.  Still, the artwork.

But wait; it gets better.  Check out another of Byra's offerings:  Organic Wet Betty.  You know, I can't say as I've ever seen a crotch shot used to sell a garden product before, organic or otherwise.  Talk about your garden porn.  (Clicking to enlarge will reveal the marketing term "plant penetrator," which I trust needs no comment.)

So somebody please help me understand.  Reading that these products are made in Canada only confuses me more, accustomed as I am to the staid image of our northern neighbors promoted on Prairie Home Companion.  So maybe they're for export only, like to randy Australian ranchers and Japanese businessmen.  See, this is so bizarre I don't even know what national stereotypes to invoke.

All right, let's say we can all get past Wet Betty's name and visuals, as unlikely as that is, and look at what's inside.  Well, turns out this little hottie contains terpenoids - who knew? - and "natural saponins derived from Yucca and Quillaja".   The text brags that this is the "best non-ionic surfactant" there is and god, isn't that just the kind of surfactant we all want?   

So back to you, Brya.  Now that you've succeeded in getting my attention, who or what are you? Meanwhile, Readers, help me out here.

WHAT'S UP WITH THE BYLINE?
Here in my corner of the Rant it kinda looks like I'm staking out my territory, doesn't it?  I'm still pondering the cosmic meaning of this change but in the meantime, at least my friends can find my stuff. 

Comments

[Marv]

I AM delighted to see the "Susan Harris" byline. Always good to know who specificaly writes this great stuff, (especially when it is my long time friend AND super writer/gardener). Thanks Garden Rant!

[chuck b.]

Maybe this stuff has a following with pot growers. I asked the clerk at my best nursery for their best potting mix. He sold me a bag of Black Gold and told me it has a strong following with people who do basement gardening. It took me a few minutes, before I "got it". Then I looked at the bag and thought, nice colors.

[Joell]

This is truly bizarre!! At first I thought that Iguana juice was made from ground-up iguanas, which horrified me (we used to have a pet iguana!). So why are they callin it that? And Wet Betty! Is Garden Rant turning into a porn site? (I hope so!)

[Trey]

I have posted on my blog, thegoldengecko.blogspot.com, some pictures from the Foxfarm Fertilizer Co. They have what I think are cool graphics, minus the sexual innuendo. The "Wet Betty" product "may" be great, but it just seems like "Wet Betty" is aimed at a less mature crowd.

[Pam J.]

This entire post is a real howler. Especially your closing line: "this is so bizarre I don't even know what national stereotypes to invoke." And I agree w/ Marv who likes the byline.

Finally, being married to a fisherman has given me lots of semi-useful information: "krill" are tiny fish/shrimp-like creatures.

[Stuart]

"Randy Australian Ranchers?"

[Black Eyed Susan]

Wet Betty!? I love it. Gardeners are HOT!

[r sorrell]

I find the art pretty amusing. I noticed that the "Wet Betty" label instructs you to feed your plants right before you turn off the lights... I, too, would assume that this stuff is for pot growers.

[John]

test

[john]

Of course, all the Advanced Nutrient products are geared to Marijuana growers. Who else is going to pay $500 for a 2 month supply of nutrients. These products are for people dead serious about yield where money is no object.

[PerthCountyCon]

Iguana Juice grows some very nices buds, some the size of watermelons .....think of what it would do for your tomato`s and such =0P